Things Somebody Else Learned
After fixating on the same piece of land, waiting, and hoping, and dreaming… it seems our plans might be changing. Don’t get me wrong we are still going to be on acreage (soon I hope). But the most recent events surrounding the land we have been waiting for have me realizing that it’s not the land that holds my dreams. What I am looking forward to most is the farm. The animals, garden, self-sufficiency, making my own homemade goods: that is what I am looking forward to. So, as I consider all the decisions we will have to make in the upcoming month. I read this posted somewhere else, and someone else looking back has me looking forward. Enjoy!
Hey folks, My family's been farming for nearly 20 years now and we've recently downsized significantly. I'm attaching a list of things we've learned over the years for your benefit and entertainment.
You can’t outrun a pig.
Never hold electric wire with your teeth while repairing electric fence.
Milking animals must happen every day, regardless of how you feel.
Women have fewer qualms about castrating animals than men do.
You can always outrun a mouthy kid.
Never work animals with a gun in your hand.
Nice boots are worth the money.
Births and deaths on a farm will happen in the worst weather possible.
Pigs will eat any baby animals they can.
Cull ruthlessly.
Horses are not tractors.
Never lean metal objects against your body while repairing electric fence.
Cull often.
Always pay the extra money to fill your tractor’s rear tires with fluid.
No amount of wishing will plug a leaky roof.
Know your limits. It gets dark daily for a reason.
It doesn’t matter what they cost, eliminate aggressive animals immediately.
You can’t outrun a cow.
Spend the time to plan animal handling facilities. You’ll add years to your life.
Chickens will never love you back.
Cull for what you want, not what someone else tells you is right.
Don’t worm. Wormy animals will die and strengthen your herd by their absence.
Yes, you do need four-wheel drive.
Sows can only be saddled and ridden when in heat.
Plant trees every year.
You can’t outrun a chicken.
Know what you’re going to do before you lasso a cow.
Perimeter fences are not always necessary.
Fuel cans you expect to be full will always be empty when you need gas.
Electric fence is 90% bluff but don’t let it catch you between the legs.
Pick up piglets by the tail only.
Learn how to plug flat tires before you go to bed tonight.
Protect everything you plant. You own at least one animal that likes how what you just planted tastes.
Accept ‘donation animals’ only if you relish ‘donation problems’.
Always bait animals. Never chase them.
There’s no substitute for a convenient water source.
Just because you have an idea doesn’t mean it’s a good idea.
Yelling at animals never works. Yelling at people also never works.
Find a mentor – and then another and another.
If your animals don’t work on your farm, you have the wrong animals.
Take regular vacations away from home and farm.
Here’s to me continuing to dream and hope and wait. I’ll be a farm girl soon
“Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet”
